Pierre's Roses

When I was home shortly in April, my besties and I were driving up to Los Angeles to get my official Visa to stay in France. Along our four hour travel journey, there was a program on the Radio called, “Ryan’s Roses.”

The basic set up of “Ryan’s Roses,” is to show was a skieze bucket boys can be. We had a few good laughs, but mostly at how dramatic each couple reacted.

Yesterday afternoon, I was driving home from work and actually fully understood the conversation on the radio and it went something like this.

Pierre (aka. The radio DJ): Hi Clarisse how are you today?

Clarisse (the suspicious girlfriend): sniff sniff. Not good. I think my boyfriend Matthieu (pronounced like Ha-chew (when you sneeze) But with the name Matt) is cheating on me.

Pierre: Oh nooooo.

Clarisse- Yah. Sniff sniff

Pierre: Are you sure you want to find out the truth?

Clarisse- Yes. Sniff sniff.

Pierre: Okay well then here we go (dial tone)

Now, Pierre will call Matthieu offer him a free dozen roses to any girl of his choice, completely free. Or so Matthiew thinks….

Ring Ring.

Matthieu (The Skieze Bucket): Bonjour!

Pierre: Hi, I am so and so from such and such and you have been “randomly” selected to win a free dozen roses to be sent to any one you wish.

Matthieu: Free? You sure?

Pierre: Yes free! All you have to do is give us a name, and a message. And we will send the roses completely free.

Matthieu: Great. Can you send them to Sophie.

Pierre: And the message?

Matthieu: I miss you, and can’t wait to see you again.

Pierre: Oh can you hold on a Second?

Matthieu: sure

Pierre: Clarisse, do you know who Sophie is?

Clarisse: No. Sniff Sniff. Matthieu- you are cheating on me?! Sniff sniff

Matthieu: I don’t know what you are talking about? Are you crazy? Trying to catch me cheating on you? You are crazy!

Clarisse: Sniff Sniff. We are over.

This is essentially the exact same dialog I listened to on “Ryan’s Roses” just a few months ago. Proff that, whether in Cali or Paris, boys are retarded.

Now, I am not around to listen to the program in the U.S, and Just now understood the dialogs taking place here. So my question is, How have the boys around the world not yet caught on to the program? Even I know if you are offered roses… you better say your girlfriend or you are going to be busted in T-minus 5 seconds. Or you shouldn’t be a cheating!!! Lame.