Baby Boom!

I love my life right now. So why is it, that everytime I open my facebook the panic of the ticking clock begins to set in. Tic Tic Toc goes the clock. Like the rabbit from Alice and Wonderland I am left running in a panicking hurry looking at my watch and not at my beautiful scenery screaming “I’m late! I’m late! I’m Late!” Well… I am not as late as some… which just might be the problem.

Everyone is pregnant! And those who aren’t - probably just had a baby, or don’t yet know that they really are prego. I am overjoyed at each announcement I receive from a friend that they are getting married or having a baby. Individually I think they are absolutely fantastic, the best thing to happen for my friends, and ecstatic for their blessings in life.

But… when I open my facebook and each picture staring back at me is a photo of a new born baby, wedding gown pictures, or a status update of cute baby Jill- the panic button is pressed. How is it, that I can be so easily manipulated into forgetting all the great things I have going on in my life at this moment; and obnoxiously believe that I am fully missing out- and running out of time to ever have, what they already do?

I logically fully know and acutely aware that I am no where prepared or wanting to have a bun in this oven. I am happy that it’s my friends having the babies and me who gets to celebrate with them, and not be in the room pushing. But what makes me feel pushed to be headed towards mommyville?

I think part of it, is because I am so far away from that even being an option in my life. I mean heck- I am a missionary living in France. It’s not like I am going out of fabulous dates every Friday and Saturday night. The closest I ever get to a boy here- is the boy who sells me my produce on Sundays. But my how I do look forward to my weekly Market Boy.

It’s funny- being in the most romantic city in the world all alone. I don’t actually every feel it- the city itself inspires all the love one can feel in life. It’s the Page Six of my Facebook that tells me I am behind in the life schedule of all my other friends that makes the uneasiness settle in.

So… when the panic arrives, I just have to take a look at my surroundings and remember how unbelievably blessed I am. And the fortunate life that I get to live. That just because love and family is not happening for me at this moment, doesn’t mean it won’t ever be. And to enjoy this moment, cause it’s the one I’ve been given, and who’s to say what else will come in the road up ahead. This time isn’t forever- it’s a special time, a time for me. And one day someday sooner than I probably realize- I will have a slobbering baby profile pic too.